i woke up at 7:45 on my own, praying it was much earlier than what it actually was so that i could close my eyes for another hour… but alas, it was time to get up. that 15 mins of going back to sleep would have killed me.

so i sat up, held my head in my hands for approx. 2 minutes… put hair stuff goodness in my hair, checked the temperature outside and twitterfox for anything that MUST be replied to ASAP and went on my way to the bathroom…

mom tried to make small conversation with me, but honestly after not speaking for a week over nothing… i’m not about to be the one to try to make things normal.

got ready within 15 mins, left 2 mins later than usual, had to run across francis lewis blvd… got to main street super fast (i was assuming there were many people off for good friday, and that’s why) and hopped on an express train. some guy was trying to get my attention, en espanol. thankfully i took a phone call and it bought a little time… then i tried to quickly get the earphones in but it did not work as expected. i get an “are you sleeping?” in spanish again and as i fumble to get the ear buds in, i get “what, you don’t speak spanish?” and i just glanced over when he started off with the “you’re honestly SO beautiful, are you american?” bit, lol… i just said thanks and put in my ear phones. hate that.

helped out some lost 18/19 year old kid @ 42nd street, seems like he doesn’t travel the trains much – he didn’t believe me that all orange line trains go to 23 ave… he let a B and a V go by and checked the big map and his iphone map like 89x before the F came…

no delancey street boy, however. i did see jason schwartzman again, lol. this time, i spotted him outside of my building in what seemed to be running gear, including a camo print hat. not even a cool camo print, it was like that weird digital camo i think. either way… this is the third time i’ve seen the boy and he ended up looking like he was trying to avoid confrontation. you know, i’m seriously never going to ask him for an autograph or a pic, i wish he’d relax… he was looking kinda cute today. he shaved and looked a bit on the tan side? i coulda have been imagining things, i had wind/tear in my left eye.

work went well aside from the fact that everyones website wouldn’t connect via FTP for some odd reason – a bunch of customers changed their ftp connections and didn’t tell us… hello…. how are we supposed to do custom work if we can’t get into your server, asses…

went to see the faint tonight with elle – they are so good live. they sounded PERFECT… they didn’t play sex is personal, boo. but they did have a sick set otherwise…

then we went to holiday cocktail lounge, strolled a little more and called it a night.

on the 4 train to grand central, i get some guy asking me where i was coming from, etc. he was all thugged out… i just kept nodding answers at him so i didn’t have to talk to him and then he started asking me about my pants.

says he likes them. says he wanted to know the brand…  i said i have no idea so i didn’t have to talk to him and then he asked me to turn around so he could “look for the label”.  seriously? lol. riiiiiiiiight. so i just told him the brand to shut him up…  he says he likes how tight they are and how the give me shape near my thighs/hips. lol. he also assumes i’m spanish (wtf?) and i told him i was a whitey and went on my merry little way.

home sweet home.
and about to hit the hay.

i hate life on this daily commute.
i’m trying so hard to not get snooty with either of them, too tired for this BS…

he then proceeded to tell me one of his friends lives near danzig and saw him working out to his own music.  and i told him that they were still touring and he didn’t believe me.  but i did go see them A LOT in the early 2000′s…  and they were always good.  they played misfits, ramones AND black flag at those shows. nice trio instead of just misfits i think, and they played for a long time each show.  it was a ton of fun.

it was a heated discussion that my friend laura found quite amusing, since she had no idea what we were talking about…  whatever…  but apparently, these punk rock boys can be deceiving in their upscale monkey suits…

…little did we realize the elevator was locked as well as the staircase doors to get onto the floors…  worst.  so we hung out in the staircase for a few and then decided to move ourselves to a local bar for a $10 pitcher of bud light before the events of the evening started…

decided i wasn’t going to bother with the male species at all, until some suit that worked for AMEX wound up chatting with us…  someone put suicide machines on the jukebox at the bar and all three of us were like ???  whoa!  and YES! and he was impressed i knew who they were – me and soph were like, this is our scene…

we started talking about shows and stuff, that we were going to h2o/dropkick the next night…  i started bitching about bamboozle featuring face to face this year and he was going on and on about face to face as soon as i mentioned them, and nofx.

…why am i always so fascinated by boys who are into the same type of music as me?  he even knew the little face to face intro on the nofx live album…  i was impressed.  he seemed to be really into it too, he was cute…  but looked like a taller version of my ex andrew – he kept going on about how we never would have thought he was into all that by what he was wearing…  i guess he was right, can’t judge a book by its cover – the more we talked, the more we had in common…  he stored me as “Jess Punk Rock” in his phone.  oi.

SO then we finally arrived at kate’s bday, a bunch of my friends were there…  including two people i used to work with at the video store…  weird.  we stayed there from like 10-3ish… i got mangled…   i never got drunk with my friend mike malave because he was straight edge for years so i was psyched, and made it a point to get drunk with him.  vodka+cranberry on repeat, not good.

me and soph just left, dunno why.  i don’t remember leaving really…  was really fubar, worst.  i don’t remember going home except for the fact that i didn’t remember transferring from the 1 to the 7 but managed to, and was confused waking up at main street since i didn’t remember changing trains at all.  we got home and passed out, it was wonderful.

all day i was recovering in bed, hang overs SUCK.  but at least i haven’t pulled that off since head automatica…  3 months in good condition!  woo!  then we went to go see h2o/dropkick murphy’s at roseland…

we missed most of h2o, didn’t realize they’d be on so early…  found MIA billy taint in the crowd…  had a good time watching dropkick.  i was so irish inspired, i love my kind.  …except for when they’re HUGE, drunk and pumped up by irish punk rock.  SCARY.  seriously.  oh, those fucking micks<3  -  that has got to be THE scariest/most brutal pit when they play st. patty’s day…  woof.

there were a lot of hot irish boys there in their little rugby shirts and paperboy hats…  (i was the only girl wearing a hat like that, whattt?)  ughhh – i loved it.  shamrock tattoo’s everywhere…  grrr!  i want one so bad.  maybe i’ll get one to match my sisters, but not on the back of my neck like hers…  maybe on my right wrist.  shit, i love irish culture.  i was raised more with irish/german culture than anything.  oh MAN i was loving it.  and it made me wanna see black 47 so badly.  i wonder if their gonna do irish night at citifield… – AUGUST 22nd – IRISH NIGHT – WOO!

annnnnnnnnnnnd today i just went to cascarino’s, hung out with erica and we went to her uncles house for a bit in long island.  had some din din, chillaxed.  i love my chill out days with her.  so comfy.

um last thing:
RANGERS WON!

and that folks, was my weekend.

BEDTIME.

well today, they decided to make it local after it was pulling out of 74th and broadway. and the damn train was too packed to try to get out at the next stop to go back…   i wasn’t too late to work, just made it.  but still.

GRRR.

then they keep us @ queensborough plaza because apparently an express train BEHIND us had to pass us.

um. yeah. what?
how was there an express train BEHIND us?

i was stuck sitting next to some guy with the worst breath i’ve ever smelled who felt the need to keep coughing and breathing with his mouth open.  i wanted to cry.

my everyday, and things today…

my everyday:

(we’re the corner office with the windows open!)

my today.

woke up with my head in my hands again, just trying to face another commute.
tried to let oscar in, he was being a weirdo – so i kept him outside.

put my bangs up/back because they’re JUSTTTTTT long enough for a poof and the wind tore that shit right down, lol.  even hair sprayed to shit, they lasted about 5 minutes outside my door.

WORST!

was working on another religious website again, pretty much all day.  the case i have is 72 pages of coding to do.  god is going to punish me for finding entertainment in the pictures of deceased nuns.  (no they don’t show them deceased, it’s a memorial page…  lol.)  some are ADORABLE, and some are scary and/or funny…  i’ve gotta find humor in everything…

at lunch, i was walking with the wind (and shawn) and it made me run.  i was just moving enough to walk and i flew ahead of him.  the wind is no joke down by the brooklyn bridge between the buildings…  i mean, i know the wind was bad everywhere, but had i jumped while walk/running…  i may have blown away and perished, lol.

long ass commute home.
as i hopped on the F train, some teenage girl and her mom were sitting down and she looked at me and gasped and said “oh my god, that’s so hot!” and smiled at me…   i’m guessing she was referring to my septum.   the mother instantly looked at her like “yeah, right”.  i smiled and put on my ipod…

i’m finally home, and  it feels good.

i’m going to take out the garbage for my mom, and hop in the shower.
i can’t wait to stand under the hotttttt water for like ten minutes.
let is just wash my cares away.

then i’m going to watch dream a little dream, and hopefully fall asleep.

HE i.m.’d me and called me to hang out tomorrow…  who knows if it’ll even happen, or what will happen.  what will it be?  or will it be weird?  i hope not.  i don’t know what i hope for.

i wish the other one was around :(  worst.
twatever.

whatever, someone good will come along when the time is right.  for now, i guess i’ll have to just try my hardest not to care emotionally about anyone;  stay numb.  but that’s just not like me.

but i need some booty.

oh, life.

i took the adventure alone today, marilyn was MIA.

i always gasp for breath when i walk up my york st. station in the morning.  it’s 2 flights of stairs, a long/steep uphill ramp, and then 2 more flights of stairs.

the starbucks people always know what i want before i order it.

had a salad and a slice for lunch.
salad ingested at 1ish, pizza at 4ish.

got my wonderful co-worker about to have her baby any day now a gift card, had everyone sign it…  gave it to her and made her blush<333

avoided the bald dude who asked me out via xmas card successfully, again.

saw an extremely old tranny on the F train, she was putting on loads of make-up (including silver lip liner) still thinking she was fabulous at age 70…  she started winking at a 3 year old girl to make her smile while putting on her hello kitty winter hat.

walked passed the family singing in the tunnel in 42st/bryant park stop through to the 7 train.

sat between two “large” people all the way home on the 7, who apparently were pissed off that i have large hips/thighs as well as they do.

missed my bus literally, by two seconds.
one came like a minute later?  took the ride home with buzz and candy.
yes, those are my friends names. (well OKAY, truth be told – buzz’s real name is mike – but i don’t ever recall ever calling him that.) …he and i talked about our video store days.  he was one of my co-workers at west coast video.

coded a lot.

went to dunkin donuts, but they were closed. 30 mins early?!
i knocked on the window and batted my eyelashes, got the boy to open up.
got some flat bread jammy and a pepsi…

came home, heard howling.
saw two cats doing it on the porch next door.
they sounded like dogs, not cats. weirdos.
they heard me, stopped, and one went running across the street…  nearly got killed.

coding some more.
upgrading wordpress for jes.

got daisy to use her twitter via twitterfox. WOO!

was about to dye my bangs purple, but i think i need to bleach them more.
still debating.

and that was my night.

my younger sister and i – why do i look like cuddy from house? lol

picnic area – playoffs game 6 NLCS ’06

employee of the month!!! (my sister)

sophie!

employee of the month on the big screen!!!

eh, citi field &&& shea<3.

picnic area<3

she’s always taking pics…

hey it’s missy+jedi<3! i like the two levels in the pic

coming down jan ’09

coming down jan ’09

so he took the train all the way to main street, and i let him get off and walk in front of me, and he waited on the escalator looking down at everyone and i was so skeeved that i ran up the stairs at full speed to avoid him. i didn’t want him to even lay eyes on me, i wanted to strike him.

yuck, yuck, yuck! i feel bad for the girl that was sitting across from me, because i saw him take 2/3 pics of her. she was getting so pissed off too.

going, going, but never gone<3