so i worked in a video store called “west coast video” a decade ago. i got my friend frank a job there, he got our friend mike (buzz) a job there, i got my boyfriend jeff a job there, and this kid craig was a staple there… then ended up getting a job at the gym a few stores down so he was really always there – i think he was friends with another one of our co-workers, zak. quickly, like every other queens clique, our friends melded… and here we are today… reuniting together for the first time since like 2004? (and it feels so good.) lol

i haven’t seen craig since back then, and then he went off and moved to maryland… so glad that i caught him this trip up… our west coast days were mighty fun. super excited!

i just can’t remember the last time all of us have been together. seems like aside from the weather, this is gonna be a good saturday. woo!

yesterday’s move was super annoying, and i feel so horrible for making poor george take part in it… he was such a trooper!<333 our uhaul truck rental was a little late, then we were stuck in never ending traffic in the venus fly trap, i was starrrrrving and i still had a lot of shit to do at the apartment... guh. it was more time consuming than i had thought it would have been. but we did it... with oscar screaming the whole truck ride home... worst. poor thing<3

although i've been complaining and dread my commute every morning, i'm so glad to be here. at this point, i was itching to leave my apartment. i am going to miss it, it was such a nice place, my room/closet were so big (ugh) but i felt so weird being there last month. not even going to get into it, i just can't believe it ended up where it did... can't believe wehe lost touch. whatever. lesson learned, moving along.

all i’ve unpacked (and plan on unpacking) was my clothing. i setup my tv and my computer. that’s it… keeping everything altogether so the next move in a month is easy as pie.

it feels really good to be back here, but strange too. i guess it won’t feel good until i start seeing my friends, i’m sure then i’ll feel back at home… temporarily.

crap, i already miss jen&&&jess sleepovers.
can’t wait til ridgewood sleepovers!

(haha wtf? “time of your life” by green day just came on. really? – how sort of appropriate!)

i kinda feel lost since i’m all packed up. i’m pms’ing and everything has been bothering me… oh the joys of being a woman… i can’t wait until november. new apartment, autumn in FULL effect, glassjaw, thanksgiving (hopefully upstate)… i dunno… hopefully all good things. type, delete. le sigh.

all i wanted to do was come home and watch “the rules of attraction” but the damn dvd is packed away. i should still give a peek, since the bin isn’t closed where all of my movies are… i think i’m going to end up going sleep sooner than i think though.

tomorrow i’m going to meet the landlord for the ridgewood spot! i am super excited and really hope i get it – there’s a lot of good stuff harboring over there… i’ll be right near missy, jes and george and not far from the lovers in the burbs either – ooooooh everyone cross their fingers!

tuesday i’m moving back to mom’s house…
whatever. i feel so blah about it, but at least i have a home to go back to. and if i get this place, it’ll only be for a month.

i can’t wait until all of this is over.

NEED STABILITY, stat.

adios brooklyn!<3

(more…)

today, i want to do the following:

• get coffee
• wax my eyebrows
• go to martha’s bakery for black forest cupcakes
• see mom (which i’ll be doing a lot of soon anyway)
• see george

but what will actually happen?

it’s currently 1:09 PM. it’s still KIND OF early… i could make all these dreams come true. the only solid plans here are the coffee and george. if i get my ass up to go to queens RIGHT NOW, i could be there by 3 the latest. eat, get coffee, jump on the F to the 7 to main street to get to the Q14 to get into whitestone… wax the eyebrows, stroll around, go visit mom, go up to bell (erica won’t be there, boo that.) to martha’s bakery for the cupcakes OR find george and drag him to austin street to the other martha’s, since it’s kinda near his area, then dinner and a sleepover??? (PLAN?!)

see, isn’t that easy? sounds like a plan!

what i SHOULD be doing is bringing my shit home. i packed mostly everything. just have to get some heavy duty laundry bags for my jackets and pants… but i’m not going to pester george to help with his hand being injured. i think i’m going to have to take off monday to do this. that way i’ll have jen to help and steve can drive the truck. i need functioning man hands.

ready? set? GO!

• pack up my life
• save up $1400 $1100 within 4 weeks
• get shit back to moms (temporarily)
• get new shoe holder
• hear back from mike about place in ridgewood
• throw more shit out!
• buy some towels
• pick up pink wardrobe from andrews upon apartment confirmation

i can’t believe i have to uproot myself again. at least i’m going back to queens. sure, there may be other parts of brooklyn i could be happier in, but it really doesn’t matter… queens is where my family and friends are. and i’m glad i’m going back. not back to the burbs, but close enough to everyone that matters.

if anything, brooklyn heights will someday sway me back. otherwise…

bk isolation – over and out.<3

thanks jen & ilya for making my brooklyn experience so much fun<333

last night i did not get the laundry done. tonight, i did.
i lugged a huge lesportsac weekender and a little basket, four long blocks to the laundromat…

not too crowded tonight.

am i really blogging about doing the laundry? god i suck at life.

there’s always some little kid that seems to become fascinated with me there. tonight it was a little hasidic boy, about 5ish – walking back and forth, and every time he would pass me by he would stare right at my face. hardcore, head/neck following. i was like ??? lol

then some indian lady came in with her three kids and two of them were on scooters… the littlest one was about 3, and she put him down and he just stood there staring at me dead in the face. just stood there… so i smiled, i waved… nothin. just eyes opening a little wider and back to normal.

the mother bought his older brother an ice cream cone and he unwrapped it and threw the entire wrapper on the floor. he just left it there and did three laps around the place on his scooter… the mother hadn’t turned around yet to see it on the floor… and the kid saw me looking at him when he dropped it, and kept looking at me all guilty like. so when he made his last lap, i pointed at it and he finally picked it up and threw it out… little brat, lol.

(more…)

god i just realized how cheesy that post about george was the other day, sorry – lol.

whatever, i’m happy. and it’s better than complaining like i usually do…

i have no agenda for the next two days. i feel like i should go to queens so that i have something to do today. once my nails dry, i’m going to do just that. i can’t sit around this apartment anymore.

i get a bomb dropped on me wednesday night by frank that the landlord isn’t letting him renew the lease, so apparently we have to move. but then frank said he was going to speak to his lawyer about how we weren’t given adequate notice about this… and the hot water was off the other day… (now it’s back on) man… i don’t know what’s going on, and i haven’t seen frank. i have to figure out the living situation then i suppose… with the quickness.

NOT going back to my mothers. nahhhhh. nah.

even thinking about this is giving me a headache right now.

going to get organized and get the fuck out of here.
want to see erica, stat.<3

…i had kind of a strange and tiring day…

this morning i woke up and got ready at a slower pace than i wanted to, but felt better about it when i walked up to the Q train platform and the train arrived after about 3 minutes after i climbed up there… i was stuck sitting in front of a day camp group of about 10 on the train. they wouldn’t hold still and kept hitting my knees. their ages ranged from about 4/5-12. obnoxious little fuckers were all wearing neon orange hats to distinguish themselves in a large group outing i guess… aggravating colour to look at first thing in the morning i suppose… they kept trying to fit like 3/4 kids in a 2 person spanned area… wanted to get up but the train was so packed that i couldn’t.

whatever. 34th street rolls up. they’ve been gone, good. i get stuck behind some chick on the staircase/upstairs who feels the need to stroll like we’re on a romantic walk on the beach… bitch, move. you’re in the subway. so finally i get up to herald square… doing my usual bus lane speed walking up to penn… i get downstairs to the ticket machine and this FOOL is taking 9739 years. all the ticket machines are in use, so i stay where i am. he’s stuck straightening out his dollar bills… last one. print. go. — i buy my ticket, get down the stairs to track 17, doors are closing. don’t see train door opening person to give the pleading look to… starbucks it is.

venti iced skim marble mocha and a reduced fat very berry coffee cake. (i’m sure it is, whatevz.) lots of yankee fans everywhere. (ew) — waiting, waiting, waiting. people watching… trying to figure out on the big LIRR map where atlantic ave LIRR stop comes into play, no conclusive info. — train on track 20. skipping murray hill and auburndale (my stop). hoooooorah. to bell blvd i go.

surprise erica, pick up lunch for me and ma dukes… kisses and hugs from aniceto, jorge and julio<3 (casci’s fam!) get a ride from delivery driver… finally get to my mom.

i haven’t posted at all about what’s been going on with my mother lately… she went for a stress/echo test and it came back positive. which means there could have been a blockage in her heart. we found this out last week. yesterday she went for an angioplasty and it came up clean! no blockage! woo! but i still went to take care of her, where they inserted the catheter is all stitched up and sore. she isn’t really supposed to walk that much, so i helped out all day. we watched a lot of TV, which was cool since i don’t watch much TV in general… had fun talks, lots of laughs, just hung out…

all i wanted to do at 9:44PM was begin my journey back home to brooklyn… i’m so tired with all the caffeine coursing through my veins since 10AM, holding two heavy shopping bags full of BS… i’m just minding my business, trying to haul ass to the auburndale LIRR station – as i’m walking from mom’s to the train stop, some tan car holding a bunch of hooligans passes me by and some kid screams out “nice hair, stupid!”. i’m like, yeah okay whatever – it’s dark out. next block, five mins later, another car passes me with two or three kids in it passes by and one screams out “bitch!”… lol… really? wtf is wrong with people?

…mind you my hair is down today with a bobby pin holding a chunk of the front/left with a bobby pin. that’s it. i’m wearing flip flops, shorts and a v-neck today. i look kinda normal, not so stand out-ish… what the hell?

another car passed by and there were whistles being blown… sorta evened out the insults, lol…

zzz. can’t wait to hit the bed.

i woke up to a text from my babe rox who wanted to chill out at coney (holy fuck she makes me feel pale, lol… look at my legs! i need a tan!) – the siren music fest was going on, so we were gonna hit that up. i heard a lot about it all week but i didn’t know what type of music it was or anything so i checked out their website. this year i only knew two bands from the line-up. i checked out the other years and there are some GOOD bands on the past events. cursive played in 2007! aaaaaaaaaaaand i wasn’t there, boo that.

so i’m on my way to her… on the Q train, sitting in the two seaters at the end of the car, sippin’ on my huge iced coffee, texting away, minding my business… when this dude feels the need to come next to me and undo his belt/pants and tuck in his wife beater and redo his belt. ew. as if that wasn’t horrid enough to have to witness, he starts doing a train car workout.

could i even make this shit up? (pics after the jump)
(more…)

yeah so the fourth of july (yawn)… i went to coney to chill out with ilya and his friends, met up with my lovie pie jewels @ her cool booth in the coney outdoor market… (don’t know if it’s got a specific name or not) – was supposed to meet up with miss kay too, but plans got all messed up with her friends so she didn’t come down (she’s from upstate, ny). i bought two cool bracelets from jewels, and my favorite new shirt – it reads QUEENS silk screened in white/red varsity letters on a black youth medium – simple, yet oh-so perfect… met her sister and mom, hung out for a bit. checked out the locals. (what a bunch of fascinating weirdo’s, lol).

coney was way too packed so once ilya found me we headed over to brighton beach with his friends, i FINALLY got some sun… we got the BEST frozen smoothie things and just chilled out for a bit. laughed a lot, watched almost naked russians prowl the beach, good times… ilya had to take care of his dog so we left and then we wound up at his friends for a BBQ… no fireworks except for the ones we made… (giggity!) lol…

god bless america!

okay it’s 3 AM, why am i still awake?  not only that, i’m awake in my bedroom at mom’s house.
i have nothing to do here.
all that’s in my room here is some laundry, a shelf with candy/2 lunchboxes and a candle, and my bed.

thank god i found the USB cord for my iphone or else i wouldn’t have aim, or a phone.  my shit was fully charged when i left brooklyn and apparently i wore it out…  it was on its last leg here when i got home from being out all day.

i’m on a laptop.
WORST.

i feel like i can’t type correctly on laptops and i feel like it just HAS to be adding to my wrists that are already going to be cursed with carpel tunnel syndrome in the future…  wa wa wa worst!

so yeah, still don’t have internet at home.  frankie says i need a wireless card in my computer.  bleh.  i don’t even know when i’m getting one.  i really just want to get it so that i can freelance and make some damn extra money…  blah.

so my first week at the apartment has gone pretty well.  still don’t know more than four people that live in brooklyn, so that’s kinda getting to me…  i feel bad that i always look to frankie for brooklyn guidance, or depending on him for social sanity.  it would be a lot easier if i had the internet to keep me preoccupied…  anyways i’ve gotten used to the commute already, just need to get more acquainted with my hood.  i know where some stores are and one train stop away there’s food and stores…  i need to find a bar we can regularly frequent so that we can make some friends…  poor oscar is still not settled with the dog…  he keeps hitting him though…  and the dog doesn’t bite at him or anything…  he’s only barked at him, hopefully it’s just the whole getting used to each other thing…

hmm.  so yeah…  the beginning of the week my friend jen who dates my friend from bayside came over to my house…  she kinda lives near me – kept me company during the day…  and then i went to go see the kills with rox.  we had a romantic asian dinner (lol) and then drinks and music.  my sexy little date…  friday laura came over and we got drunk with frankie :)  watched tv, bugged out…

today erica and i went to see her “friend” (boyfriend) box for the NYPD – they fought against the suffolk county PD
it was interesting…  something different to do.
pauly from rocky was there and the father from “family bonds” (retired HBO series) was there too.

now i’m in queens.
lonely.
in a boring room.

tomorrow for mother’s day we’re going to the mets game and just hanging out i guess…  going to see the bouncing souls at night.  (woo!)  i haven’t seen them since my bday, hopefully this set – they won’t let me down.  last time they suckkkkkkkkkked. (acoustic nonsense)

so rad.

i’m gonna try to lay down for sleepy time.

so i broke it down to my mom tonight.  told her the moving out dealio.
such a hard thing to do, just as bad as i thought her reaction would be.

(more…)

so i’m gonna be moving out again soon…  and it got me thinking about how many times i have in fact moved in my life.  so let’s retrace my steps, and places i’ve called home.

where i live now (05-present)
whitestone (2003-2005)
bayside (sept.2002-feb.2003)
whitestone (1995-2002)
whitestone (1994-1995)
flushing x 2 (1993-1994)
college point (1989-1993)
the bronx (1988-1989)
whitestone (1987-1988)
flushing (1986-1987)
whitestone (1984-1986)
flushing (1981-1984)
mom’s uterus (1981) (lol<3)

can you see why i miss living in whitestone???

i can either take the F train from 74th and broadway or 42nd st/bryant park from the 7 line.  74th and broadway is still in queens and the other stop is in the city, obviously…  so if a 7 express goes local i still have the chance to get off and take it from 74th and broadway…

well today, they decided to make it local after it was pulling out of 74th and broadway. and the damn train was too packed to try to get out at the next stop to go back…   i wasn’t too late to work, just made it.  but still.

GRRR.

then they keep us @ queensborough plaza because apparently an express train BEHIND us had to pass us.

um. yeah. what?
how was there an express train BEHIND us?

i was stuck sitting next to some guy with the worst breath i’ve ever smelled who felt the need to keep coughing and breathing with his mouth open.  i wanted to cry.

wow, that felt normal.
i forgot what it was like.

:le sigh:
anyways.

the stupid LIRR didn’t even check my $7 ticket heading back towards queens tonight, so i’m gonna use that shit a different day. in fact, i think i should ride the LIRR everyday and see if they don’t check tickets often! maybe the people paying $100+ a month are stupid! shit was packed, ticket people couldn’t walk through if they wanted to… that’s like the fifth time in the past six months that’s happened to me…