that chick jess is truly dazzling » oscar http://www.posed-to-death.org Just another WordPress site Sat, 21 Jan 2012 00:10:04 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2 boom http://www.posed-to-death.org/2011/06/07/boom/ http://www.posed-to-death.org/2011/06/07/boom/#comments Tue, 07 Jun 2011 19:14:26 +0000 stujessica http://www.posed-to-death.org/?p=6446 i woke up last morning to what sounded like someone trying to punch in my window.  of course, it being about 6:30AM and coming out of a deep sleep, i had no idea wtf was going on.  i thought my apartment was being broken into.  i couldn’t find the cat until i heard the dreaded sound again.  and then i saw his fat body on the other side of the blinds standing up and hitting the window.

he and a stray cat have become mortal enemies and have battles through the window.

yes, they actually physically go at each other on the glass.

assholes…

i couldn’t fall back to sleep for a good hour after that :(

like, how hard did the outside cat come at oscar that he woke me up? i hope he’s okay because it was loud, lol.

]]> http://www.posed-to-death.org/2011/06/07/boom/feed/ 1 walking.zombie http://www.posed-to-death.org/2011/04/07/walking-zombie/ http://www.posed-to-death.org/2011/04/07/walking-zombie/#comments Thu, 07 Apr 2011 15:17:08 +0000 stujessica http://www.posed-to-death.org/?p=6198 last night i didn’t get home from work until nearly 9 pm… so once i got to freelancing, eating dinner and watching tv and relaxing, i didn’t realize how much later it was since i was in two hours later than usual… i didn’t get to sleep until almost 3 am (i just couldn’t) and i woke up at 6 am with the cat puking up a hairball… and that little turd did it on the edge of my bed and blanket. just enough to piss me off… but he was at the edge of the bed! he knows i want him doing that on the tile floor, wtf? (dont’ try to tell me otherwise, cats know what they’re doing…)

anyways, i had to clean it all up, and after scolding him the entire time, i couldn’t fall asleep for nearly an hour. …and i had to be up at 8:15.

i look like “who did it and ran”, and i keep yawning :(
this coffee isn’t helpingggg o_o

]]> http://www.posed-to-death.org/2011/04/07/walking-zombie/feed/ 0 potty.kitty http://www.posed-to-death.org/2011/04/05/potty-kitty/ http://www.posed-to-death.org/2011/04/05/potty-kitty/#comments Tue, 05 Apr 2011 14:13:55 +0000 stujessica http://www.posed-to-death.org/?p=6171 so right before my cat is about to shit, for some odd reason he runs around the apartment at like, 500 mph in circles…  he jumps all over the place without paying attention and is a little wild man.  keeping that in mind, he did it last night right before i went to bed. and it must have stayed in my subconscious…

in my dream last night (the only part that i really remember), i was in my aunt/uncles old apartment upstate and their toilet bowl flush was super powerful…  stupid oscar comes flying into the bathroom and as i’m flushing the toilet after using it, guess who jumped in? …and got sucked in :(

yeah… in my dream i saw my poor little kitty stuck in a toilet. mainly i just saw his little arms sticking out and i pulled him out… and on the first pull, he was stuck at his ribs.  it was the worst feeling ever, because it felt super real, and i felt like i was hurting him.

i got him out easily after the next pull and just hugged him, and told him to slow the eff down.

it was horrible to see him like that :(

]]> http://www.posed-to-death.org/2011/04/05/potty-kitty/feed/ 2 dammit.oscar http://www.posed-to-death.org/2011/02/15/dammit-oscar/ http://www.posed-to-death.org/2011/02/15/dammit-oscar/#comments Tue, 15 Feb 2011 06:12:35 +0000 stujessica http://www.posed-to-death.org/?p=6032 Y U NO DO THIS???

Click here to view the embedded video.

my cat is a spoiled, lazy fuck.

]]> http://www.posed-to-death.org/2011/02/15/dammit-oscar/feed/ 2 cat.poot http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/12/31/cat-poot/ http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/12/31/cat-poot/#comments Fri, 31 Dec 2010 22:10:50 +0000 stujessica http://www.posed-to-death.org/?p=5855 i got oscar in 2005…  and since i’ve had him, he’s only farted around me one time.  i picked him up in a weird way and he wasn’t ready for it, and  one slipped out.

he has done a good job of not letting another one slip…
until just now.

he just pooted when i went to go hug him on my bed.  i put my arm around him for a hug while he was sitting up a little, and totally smelled it and he got all embarrassed and pissed off.  he immediately jumped off the bed and is staring at me with the death stare.

]]> http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/12/31/cat-poot/feed/ 0 exhausted http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/12/10/exhausted/ http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/12/10/exhausted/#comments Fri, 10 Dec 2010 19:51:38 +0000 stujessica http://www.posed-to-death.org/?p=5674 so i’ve kind of been social lately and really feeling run-down… not getting proper sleep and being inebriated often, so on wednesday (after i decided to straighten my hair at 9PM), i got super tired watching judge judy and passed out at like 10:30… i knew i still had to iron my hair so i set my alarm clock from 8:30 AM to 8 AM so that i gave myself time thursday morning to perfect my mane…

so of course, my burnt ass completely forgot to set it back and my alarm went off at 8AM this morning… and i got super happy because i had an extra thirty minutes to sleep… i went looking for kitten for a cuddlefest as soon as i woke up, but of course he was sitting in front of his dry food dish staring at it (like it was going to magically fill itself? OR he was trying to give me a guilt trip – as if i starve his fat, gray ass…)

so finally, he comes back to the bed… as i’m trying my hardest to stay in my “hey-i-could-still-fall-asleep-mode”, i’m getting all cozy and waiting for him to curl up with me near my chest… and he just stands there staring at me, purring.

just standing, and staring.

so i ask him to sit down – and he KNOWS what it means… and he goes in circles and stand there some more, then finally sits down after a good ten minutes of me battling with him about it… then after enough time for me to finally get cozy with him (leaving me with about ten minutes left of napping), he just gets up and walks back to the dry food dish…

and then as i’m leaving to go to work gives me the sad eyes like i’m abandoning him…

he’s such an asshole.

]]> http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/12/10/exhausted/feed/ 1 pink.chair http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/11/15/pink-chair/ http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/11/15/pink-chair/#comments Mon, 15 Nov 2010 05:40:40 +0000 stujessica http://www.posed-to-death.org/?p=5443 OSCAR LIKED IT TOO :(sooooooooooo when i moved to ridgewood, i didn’t bring one of my favorite things in the entire world with me… i’m not even entirely sure why, because i had opportunities with sophie’s array of large cars to bring it over… but for whatever reason, i had left it at my mothers house. and it was the worst decision, ever.

about six years ago, i was strolling through the warehouse part of ikea and came across what seemed like hundreds of piled up, chunky plastic chairs. my best friend sophie had one and i always thought it was cute, and at that time they were carrying hot pink ones… so i grabbed one at the amazing price of…………… $5! (#best) and it was seriously one of my favorite things about my bedroom decor.

when i moved out of my moms house this last time, my younger sister ended up taking my old room because it was larger than hers was. and that’s where i had left my precious chair.

one weekend, we were painting her new room from my dreary dark gray to a lovely shade of dark purple. and she thought it would be a genius idea to stand on my chair to paint an area that was higher than she could reach…

not so genius.

she went right through the damn chair with one of her legs.




my pink ikea chair - RIPso as if that wasn’t traumatic enough to endure… i was painting all productively and hear a BOOM! and then the plastic crack… and i just knew. i just felt it in my bones. so i turned around and it was confirmed, it was done for.

it was really hard seeing my sisters leg through the damn thing… i froze and teared up a little. and then she asked me to help her out of it.

can you imagine the nerve?

LOL jk jk jk… (i seriously did stand there for a second though and she yelled at me to help her, lol. BUT SHE WAS FINEEEEEEEEE…)

so i have been checking craigslist and ebay on the regular for this damn thing monthly to no avail… i can’t find any damn colours either, even though i’d specifically like the pink one again.

if you have one or if you see one, PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE TELL ME!!!!! – you’d make my life so happy and complete again<3

#notevenkidding

oh right, the other part of this damn post.

so the other night, i’m going to the boys house and as i’m walking from the train station… i saw what i thought could have been the answers to all of my pink chair problems… until i hit the other side of it and saw that it too, like mine, was mangled…

pink ikea chair - also broken pink ikea chair - also broken pink ikea chair - also broken

-_______________-

]]> http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/11/15/pink-chair/feed/ 1 pets http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/09/03/pets/ http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/09/03/pets/#comments Sat, 04 Sep 2010 01:19:17 +0000 stujessica http://www.posed-to-death.org/?p=4882 i need a bigger apt. i want a 1 bedroom instead of a studio… almost a year has been quite enough to realize this. as soon as i do gtfo – i’m getting myself a small dog. my cat hates me… it’d be therapeutic to have a furry little companion that loves me more than 40% of the time.

]]> http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/09/03/pets/feed/ 0 oscar http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/08/21/oscar/ http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/08/21/oscar/#comments Sat, 21 Aug 2010 18:54:28 +0000 stujessica http://www.posed-to-death.org/?p=4791 when i’m showering or bathing, oscar sits in the bathroom with me.  usually on top of the closed toilet cover…  and then when i’m finished taking  a shower or a bath, oscar loves going into the tub. he just sits there for a while…   i think until the air isn’t warm any longer…  he sits and stares at the drain or he sits and watches the water dripping.  it’s really cute – he tilts his head while he does either, as if he’s trying to figure it all out.

i guess it’s his “deep time”, lol.

]]> http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/08/21/oscar/feed/ 0 eww http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/08/07/eww-2/ http://www.posed-to-death.org/2010/08/07/eww-2/#comments Sun, 08 Aug 2010 00:29:46 +0000 stujessica http://www.posed-to-death.org/?p=4699 why does the cat always pooh right after i clean out the box?

what an a-hole -____-

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