that chick jess is truly dazzling

memories

i have a good long term memory, i tried to log my life here, key elements of it.

2-3 – i remember dancing to “shake your booty” by kc+the sunshine band. mom loved that song. i was addicted to “hungry like the wolf” and my cousin michael. my babysitter had blue hair and i remember her trying to teach me how to blow bubbles with strawberry/banana gum. i had these bunk beds with drawers underneath i used to hide things in. i had a smurf car! i remember those diagonally striped sheets my mom had. (later to be discovered in the fiona apple video for criminal.) little red hen in the crib with marie, my top (toy) and red/white/blue ball (favorite toys back then). i also ate my chicken pox off of my knuckles at cathy’s house (EWW!). i was SCURRED of my cousin jimmy and i remember cousin jens yellow furniture… i remember being at Bridie’s.

4-5 – phil collins, the pretenders, the cars, my huge house, sarah being born, the “tent” in moms office, aunt carol and uncle billys “parties” (ice cream sundae time!) and watching mr. ed on nick at nite, my first david bowie tape, my tin kitchen set-up, my popple tent, our house in the hamptons, sarahs dad, being a total jerk in kindergarden throwing tantrums and hiding in my cubby or the wooden fridge, lord+taylors and a+s with mom, being a kid model and hating it, the halloween party when my mom was the big shark, my cardboard box fort aunt carol helped me with, walking on sunshine nicole at sarahs baptism, the flags near the lock on sarahs dads caddy car door handle, the lines on the sundance back window, being goldilocks in the kindergarden play, moms long purple silky nightgown, moms pink bathrobe.

6-7 – having she-ra EVERYTHING, getting my pinky toe stuck under the door, level42 “something about you”, the splinter/the surgery on my right leg, cutting all my hair off because of LICE!, sneaking clothes from home and changing in the school bathroom (LOL), learning the “i love you” hand sign, watching fraggle rock and pee wee’s big adventure with marie, wee folks, international day in first grade, yarn kites with pam, mrs marcus’s hat, planning to run away everynight while living in johns apartment, my pink dresser, my first summer at aunt edie’s and the bbq potato chips and the little tykes kitchen in the backyard with those little yellow chairs, the red power wheels jeep, my first nose bleed, playing jaws on nes in moms room, living in the bronx, the hughes brothers fight, my hot pink room, sarah tearing her diapers apart EVERY MORNING and laughing about it, moving to CP, meeting ramona, fuzzy red lip stickers on aunt patty and crew, buying my first new kids doll (jordan), my rainbow banana seat bike, my dance recital, our dream machine arcade bday party and getting caught cursing, the castle (MASSIVE wooden playground upstate), singing at shea stadium, inxs, metallica, queensryche, GNR, the cure.

8-10 – chisms park days with wee folks during the summer, going the movie theater where victoria’s secrets is now in bay terrace, jumping at sarah and getting the scar on my left shin, my genie pants, my communion, my first pet FATSO the hamster, my flower vest/white tshirt phase, those neon blue spandex pants with the green stripes on them, my lambada dress, the field with the 130th st crew, jumping off the ramp at PS29, chorus with mrs aiges, the bell at leo’s, my little white radio with the blue/pink buttons, listening to “i love your smile” and “real love” all the time, TGIF, dancing in front of my bedroom window, star search, our caboodles, those gold heart earrings, fake glasses, aunt judy living with us and driving me crazy! playing NES at ree’s house (SMB3, snoopy, friday the 13th, bubble bobble, kidicarus), faith no more, playing echo the dolphin and not knowing what the hell we were doing at aunt necies, my white/pink/purple reebok pumps, aunt patty’s blue caravan, our black minivan.

11-12 – clara, my caboodles tray, hanging out with suzy d., LEGOS, genovese trips, richard bey/whos the boss/jenny jones/ricki lake mornings, anne marie babysitting us, being deathly afraid of aliens, vaso, pearl jam, nirvana, donovan’s, the 5 corners and the big booth, the BEST summer upstate, lisa loeb, swv, the pool, beverly hills 90210, gina and the mouse house, randy and our phone calls, my awesome ikea bed, my color pencils, snes days/nights (MARIO PAINT), renee size 9, dream on, friendly’s gas, moving into joes living room, hanging out with the vento’s – the secret park/mario’s/our WB stuff, drafting several dream homes because i was SO going to be an architect, dave morales’s house, my white vanity, the fishtank with the fish with no eyes, greenday, offspring, bush, z100 ROCKING and not SUCKING like it does now, candlebox, my stupid sante fe fleece, my dark green jeans, my maroon jeans, my flower keds, joey tomao, michael conner, hanging out with angela, candlebox, live, aunt patty’s red neon, matt ott<3, watching IT for the first time, staying at aunt patty’s for a week, playing manhunt in peoples backyards in CP, stealing joe grimaldi’s jelly bellys, watching batman the tv show, fancy feet, meeting ugly kid joe, peter+clara, listening to hot97 because of nicole, beavis and butthead, liquid television in general, hanging out with laura, mango arizona’s in the can, yoo hoo in the can from mountainview, joey heinrich, lisa frank stuff, babysitting trish.

13-14 – the oj trial being on ALL THE TIME, my first kiss (JT), hot97, hanging out with sophie A LOT, flower picking, breaking suzannes ankle, sneaking out of sophies bedroom window, drinking, smoking a cigarette with angela and the girls, melissa tomao, toast of new york, my unionbay striped shirt, getting my period when i came home from school on a cold feb. afternoon, carlos, singing at carnagie hall, my secret diary, leo, john horan, louis, scooby/carlos night, hanging out with the vento’s, my pastel rainbow comforter, hootie and the blowfish, del amitri – roll to me, charlie express, moving into 151-41<3, roll to me, ren and stimpy/mario kart for SNES, wu-tang (again and again :P), hanging out with rachel, meeting billy and drew, anthony collazzo (worst!), my tommy hilfiger logo shirt, going to california, my denim tommy shirt, joe’s rotary phone, getting my beeper, weezer, star search, straightening my hair, bagels+oj at sophies after school, my bugaboo columbia jacket, andrea dee/adventureland.

15-17 – high school, hanging out with ramona+crew, wendys/mcdonalds, lost my v to harry, hanging out with georgia everyday, st ide’s at joe’s apt with anthony nieves and luis, community service at the bayside ymca, uncle george dying, hanging out with lisa all the time, micromagics, BUSH (first show ever), 311, dance music!, getting drunk in school with gabby, janelle and danielle and crew, MALIBU 3 ltr’s!, randolph<3, applebee village, absolut, javie, miami vice (home videos with the cousins/my sister), greenday tearing apart tower records, randolph going to college, heine hating me, hanging out with the vento’s, digital camera pics with soph, piercing my belly button, mr gildea (the best), almost killing dr blickstein by pulling his chair out from under him, my gap shirts, breaking up with randolph, hanging out with javie/justin/nelson ALL THE TIME, priscilla sometimes, javie sleepovers, javie 6 hour phone sessions, going to shows, getting all new bedroom furniture, my LUGZ, NOY, my aiwa stereo, virgin music store shopping sprees with randy when he worked at mtv, going to night school, bouncing souls, blink182 (the old stuff!), watching austin powers at melissa+jens 97261 times, netzero’ing emails to randy, using microsoft paint, my hearts+kisses bracelet, mars2112, MTV live, sophie scaring the shit out of me while i was peeing on my 16th bday while hiding in the shower, walking home with sarah from the dentists office at night and having our “feasts”, justins lip gloss at bay terrace that never went away, breaking my tooth, dating service movies, greg+ree, mark<3, curly hair again, smoking dust by accident, warped tour 98.

18-21 – shows shows and more shows!, raves, caryn, E, dave+beakers house, becca, stujessica.net, breaking up with randy again, yvan, piercing my lip/labret/tongue web/tongue/nose, stretching my ears, being sex-free for nearly a year, javie sleepovers, cherry pie addiction, trips to jersey every weekend, court+dave, ecca, tiff, limp bizkit/korn/disturbed/orgy phase (LOL), deftones, first souls show when i was 18, my first job (@ west coast video), james hunt<3! lol, hanging with michelle/sabrina, bill garifal, meeting frank on AOL and getting him a job with me at the video store, meeting jeff/dating jeff, walking home late nights around the block, smirnoff ice, THE BOAT (sophies fam’s mercedes), freezing my ass off at kloud909, elle’s raver pics, kims wedding, strangely meeting roxane LOL, panik<3, hanging out next to the twin towers at harolds house, the cube, dancing wallpaper, raspberry iced tea, whitestone lanes, mets playoff games, THE MISFITS addiction, meeting my father/grandmother/brother, finally discovering tampons (thanks marie!), birth control!.

22-23 – working for urban box office, hanging out with christina/andrina all the time, jimmy doom, smirnoff ice+sparks at nicks house, mike tucci, shopping on broadway with sophie when we both worked in the city, ikea/boston market with xtina constantly, friendster.com (meeting ilya off of it), being with randy EVERYDAY<3, meeting up with sophie at the times sq 7 train stop after work, taking back sunday, alk3, tony hawk 3, doing e while babysitting, jackass, lucy, pina colada slurpees and smores ritz crackers, andrew don, the sticker car, the apt, moving into the apt, my HUGE 22nd bday party, aunt carol died, big falling out with my dads side of the fam, upstate trips with xtina a lot, falling out with xtina, moving back home to moms, shows shows shows, chisms with soph every night, old navy sundays with soph, fotch’s parties, in the rain after fotch’s parties<3, cascarino’s in whitestone, ally, meeting andrew, dating andrew, actually made it to brutalfest, adopting ben, giving ben away, got josie and took puddin in, hung out with LYRIC finally, the cascarino’s xmas party, discovering head automatica/gj/alexisonfire, met serg/sandy, SAUCONY JAZZ’s, bouncing souls+misfits shows A LOT, got an ipod!, plastic barrettes.

24-25 – moving out of my house ryan and his van, hanging out with the bellerose crew a lot, making out with rob for hours (new order – ceremony/that car ride upstate), lil jon and rob helping with painting, ryans party, robs basement, chocolate lucky charms, chucky and preet and the crew coming over during a blizzard, working for necro, fills with sate/dsr, piercing my monroe, tall man’s, practically moving into drews house, archie/who’s the boss mornings, getting oscar!, uncle howie, putting xxi stickers EVERYWHERE, the five people you meet in heaven, camping, making a shit ton of contact tables, sunday matinees, cutting my hair super short, shows shows shows, down the hatch+joshua tree!, quit necro started working in cascarino’s in bayside, danae, cat, laura again!, disco bloodbath, shes come undone, the lovely bones, late night walks with my ipod down 150th st on summer nights to drews house, irving plaza<3, ryan died moving back home, meeting erica, lucky’s/white castle with erica, THE MEAT, the night at rivington, bad fights with sarah, not talking to sophie, cats cats and more cats!, working at fred flare for a day, amits birthday on bell, seeing 311 at jones beach, seeing the souls two days in a row during the 666 shows, going to jamaica with drew the next day, florida with drew (DISNEY!), seeing scandal and rick springfield live at universal studios – lol, camping, upstate sunday fundays, met jes<3, dth again! LTRZ+NMBRZ, met jeanine again, becoming more of an art fag, adopted lola<3, going to mets games all the time, grew my hair down to my waist, redoing the living room at andrews house, breaking up with andrew, dying my bangs a different colour than the rest of my hair (when it all began), meeting steve/dating steve, plum, knights of columbus on bell, hanging out with jesus and JP again, seeing lily allen with elle, taylor and erica, hanging out with thomas phenomas, meeting sean and jen<3, getting my first tattoo (souls heart), hanging out with missy all the time, piercing my septum, seeing the souls in NJ, meeting greg (lead singer of the souls), THE SUMMER OF THE ROMANIAN (barf!), coney island with joanna and mike.

26-28 – power hour at ericas, steve and i having our birthday at the knights, sarah’s birthday party on bell, the new museum opening with jedi, missy and elle – stalking DP on the wrong day – like omg like totally!), getting my hair did often by m5, yak ballz record release party/the purple VIP room @ rebel, getting my glassjaw tattoo on my chest, getting checked out by the love of my life, weekday picnics and picking up steves mom at work, sangria lunch breaks with erica at cinco de mayo, getting my new job in DUMBO, reuniting with randy, getting my 2nd souls tattoo (anchor), the shrimp, six flags with missy, getting my misfits tattoo by my friend kelly, last mets game @ shea (subway series), shonen bbq’s @ cunningham, seeing the cure live with mom and sarah, the raver reunion, getting into a physical fight with a dude at a rancid show, coney island afternoons with steve and crew and missy, going to cancun with missy and colleen, horrible/dramatic bouncing souls birthday, dying my hair crazy colours, hanging at vezza’s house, hanging out with erica all the time<3, losing iphones and making out in cabs and in the 34th street train station, bi-weekly holiday cocktail lounge traditions with sophie, tripping on e in the sex dungeon basement, christmas eve at vezza’s, breaking up with steve, getting my clip art chuck norris tattoo, dempsey’s/sleepovers with him, going to ranger games with erica, head automatica in bk – dramarama and then watching them with him, hangover m5 sleepovers, sex and nosebleeds, NOT GETTING LAID FOR MONTHS, getting my cutie little shamrock tattoo, behind home plate for mothers day 09 @ citi field, huge dempsey’s get together for my last night in queens, moving to brooklyn, the eiknarf days, sarah’s father died, cinco de mayo regular visits, finally tappin’ that argentinian i always wanted, reuniting with/dating ilya, the summer of ilya and his friends, jen madden sleepovers!, roll n’ roaster (CORN FRITTERS!), don burrito, kim’s other wedding (at the beach), being on bell blvd a lot, seeing the faint live, seeing the offspring live, seeing face to face live, ericas family BBQ in PA, getting back in touch with/dating george, my birthday party in brooklyn<3, seeing weezer live on halloween, walking around the city with george and pat lee on halloween, moving back home (landlord “sold our apt”), moving SLOWLY into ridgewood, breaking up with george, hanging out with erica a lot again, figuring out that mascara burns your eyes from crying, meeting lauren on twitter, hanging out with pat lee a lot, finding my brother again and learning that my father died, seeing h2o with steve, seeing javie sleeping over and our brunch, alk3 and alexisonfire with kristen, robbie from long island, being allowed to speak to manny, dating manny, seeing my brother for the first time in years, upstate madness, lots of time at atlas park, meeting jewfro, spending lots of time on austin street in forest hills, breaking up with manny, bayshore with ree, sarah and theo, going upstate more, hanging daily with miss bee and jes, down the hatch – take 3, hanging out with jes on the reg<3, seeing the bouncing souls on a boat, steve getting his car towed, my bday at holiday cocktail lounge, finally getting a new computer.

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