i’ve always heard about it, but i’ve never given it the time of day.

it hurt to pull myself away from the television today, for normal, social activities.

since i’m new to netflix, i’m about to see if it’s there. if not, i’ve noticed it on two channels…  i was watching it on IFC today…

i’m assuming it’s one of those cult followed shows…. and i’ve totally been sucked in.

…enough of this whole website thing, onto my show hunt.

three weeks…  no break from anything.  i just want a day alone.

nothing personal towards anyone i’ve been around these last two/three weeks… i’m just honestly life-exhausted.  i really just want to kick back with a tv all day with some yummy snacks/drinks in the middle.

my brother is leaving for florida early on sunday morning, but sunday i’m going with jes to see mary poppins on broadway…  then i need to meet up with artist homeboy for some client time…  which means all weekend, no alone time/rest… again.

ANDDDD my brother is coming back from florida on friday
i love him to death, just wish he’d be there for the entire weekend so i could take a mental break.

the lady that lives upstairs from me had bypass surgery done years ago, and her legs are bad. in fact, she uses a cane for everyday walking and on tuesday, the poor thing fell down because of messed up concrete/ice.  it was so bad that she had to be taken to the hospital she pulled her groin muscle in her left leg and bruised her tailbone…  so she can’t walk or stand at all…  she called me at around 5 on tuesday to ask me if i could fill her prescription when i got home.  i don’t think she has many people around here, and i think it’s easiest for me to be helping her because i’m right downstairs…  at any rate, since tuesday, i’ve been taking care of her in the morning before work and at night when i get home…  and it’s been really tiring.  i feel like i sound like an old fart, but coming home and doing that eats up a lot of free time.  it’s also been cutting into my own daily chores, errands and freelancing.  i can’t wait to catch up again this next coming week…

and catch up on my poor, neglected website.<3

what have i been doing? i feel like i haven’t really posted here.

um. going to shows, hanging out with lauren and wilma, hanging out with jes, getting aggravated by a dude, being pleasantly surprised by another, meeting a new one, freelancing, going on a date?, going upstate a couple of times, hanging out at my moms, decorating for xmas, drinking too much coffee and booze, getting crazy on the ex, xmas shopping, crafting, cleaning, staying warm, etc.

the confusing bore that is my life… hopefully all changing soon.

so this morning, i decided to go with the cute varsity jacket because of the “warmer” temperature (i have a scarf, also) sans-hood. bad idea.

the winds in NYC today are intense. in fact, so intense that three blocks away from my apartment in queens, my umbrella broke. some lady and i were standing next to each other trying to walk forwards and couldn’t move and we both couldn’t close our umbrellas, it was quite amusing. my umbrella sort of imploded instead of going inside out. so for the remaining two blocks, i just walked unshielded from the rain. when i finally got upstairs to my train platform, i nearly blew off of it. i had to force myself towards the middle of the floor so i wasn’t near the edge. i’m not even dramatizing.

i think my train station sitting at an angle makes the wind factor even worse.

the same windy/rainy shit happened when i got near my office building (totally gave up on my umbrella), and by the time i got upstairs i was nearly soaked. after dropping my shit off at my desk, i had the brilliant idea to go dry myself under the hand dryer in the bathroom. only problem is, there is a small gap in between the sinks that i didn’t really take into consideration before shoving my bottom-heavy body into… so i got stuck for a few seconds and almost panicked, lol.

i moved everything (ass/thighs) outward and upward, and finally broke free. but it was def. a scary moment in life. how would i even explain myself if someone had come in and caught me in that distress?

my neighbor upstairs asked me if i could feed her cat while she went away for thanksgiving, and i agreed to it because i knew i wasn’t sleeping upstate because of the bayside show… so on thanksgiving morning, my mother wanted to pick me up by 8:30 the latest, so i woke up really early and went straight upstairs to feed her cat before we went. clearly not thinking straight, i locked my bottom lock and ran up… so when i was finished feeding kitty and was coming downstairs, i had realized i didn’t grab my keys before closing the door behind me.

-_______-

i just stopped in the staircase and went “fuuuuuuucccccckkkkkkkkkk”.
i pictured my mother being super pissed about the whole thing and my landlord not being around to let me in… even if i just went out the door as i was, i was wearing sweat pants and flip flops with feet that desperately need a pedicure, lol.

luckily for me, when i got to the door (that visually seemed closed), i pushed it and it magically opened.
i have no idea how but i walked in and felt like this guy:

my mom said it was the “luck o’ the irish”, first thing out of my mouth was that “someone upstairs was looking out for me”… whatever it was, thank god it happened<3

today at work, i couldn’t decide what i wanted to eat for lunch until the very last minute. i had to hit the ATM anyway and my bagel place has one so i said fuck it, and went for a BLT. i ended up finding $50 on the floor in there! soooooo i decided to treat myself to a necklace i’ve been drooling over, and meaning to buy myself for a while.

i rarely buy myself anything nowadays since i’m still helping my mother at home, so why not?

thanks, honey.

on my dunkin donuts walk today:

• you are beautiful, will you have my children?
• your skin is like a godess’
• “god bless you”

after the “god bless you” (next to me in dunkin donuts) i said “thank you.  why?” and he said “because you’re beautiful”

i didn’t realize that it was a religious thing to be pretty…

i want and need coffee.

this is what my saturday night will consist of (because i slept through the entire day):

• coffee
• cleaning the bathroom
• freelancing
• convert s2udio.com over to the wordpress platform (lol, you would think by now i would have)
• watching teenage mutant ninja turtles (the first one) at some point
• cleaning out my closet/dressers – packing the summer things and bringing down the fall stuff

it is what it is, i partied hard last weekend, and last night…  it’s fine with me.

i could be:

• dying my bangs
• showering AND shaving my sandpaper legs
• drying the dishes in the drainboard and finishing the rest in the sink
• sweeping the floor (again – thanks oscar, you turd)
• putting the lid back on the garbage can
• cleaning the toilet/bathroom
• sleeping! (i haven’t done it correctly in days.)

i should DEFINITELY be:

• showering (all train stations were SWELTERING underground today AND both 7 trains i took today had no AC and i did a bunch of walking, eww.) and shaving my sandpaper legs
• sweeping the floor (there are little pieces of kitty litter everywhere – they get stuck in my feet i sweep like twice a day, he tortures me by doing it on purpose, i know it.)
• sleeping! (i haven’t done it correctly in days.)

i would be doing all of the above:
but i’m tired and lazy. (erica and i just stuffed ourselves with spicy nuggies from wendy’s (yes, they are back. thank you, ilya) and i managed to also fit in a cheeseburger -____-)
#fatass

in my own defense, i had a long ass day… had a lot of commuting to do… nearly died of heatstroke… came home and did the garbage and dishes right away… i have reasons to be pooped, i think!

i’m going to round up until 12:30AM and then start getting a move on.

zzz

some stupid scrawny, yuppie, white asshole cut me in line at starbucks after cock blocking the fruit/fridge  and then stands there chatting with the cashier about where they import their pumpkin scones from – i told him my grandmother made them…  move it along you stupid fuck.

lol, i guess i’m cranky in the mornings?

while i was walking to my local dunkin donuts today, i was crossing the street and as soon as i hit the corner of the next curb, two cars got into an accident behind me. i had my music on very loud, so whatever i thought i heard, i didn’t think to seriously about.. but then people in front of me were gathering and looking behind me, so i figured something must have happened… but i kept going. i only saw it on the way back.

shit, i could have been hit by a car today…
it’s a good thing i walk quickly.

it’s currently 3PM… i’ve taken 4 tylenol since 10AM and it’s sort of, just kicking in now?
WHAT. THE. FUCK.

#NOREALLYWTF

yesterday: love actually > shaun of the dead
#theUK

today: goonies > kindergarten cop
#astoriaoregon

no really, this happened. and then didn’t.

so i haven’t seen my love erica in ages… her new job takes up all of her time and i’m super lazy on weekdays so i haven’t been trekking over to bayside lately… but today i took a sick day to re-coop from my recent mental/emotional breakdown and headed over to her at a reasonably early/late afternoon hour.

after an agonizing hour long bus ride, i finally made it to main street for the LIRR to bayside… we chilled out in the air conditioning for a while and then made our way over to jackson heights to natives to sooth her craving for some yummy empanadas and beers… we stuffed ourselves silly with meat, rice and platanos and then we got some coffee and went home to watch a movie.

she put on twilight.

(more…)

yesterday after the bo and i got back from the beach, i was so tired that i couldn’t really move. so he puts on the tv, flips around a bit and goes to take a shower… he left Bravo on which was airing that “bettheny getting married” show – marathon styles. i was too lazy to change it, and got into it. (#worst) and when he came out, we wound up watching a few episodes.

when he dropped me off at home, you think the break from forest hills to ridgewood would have shaken it off, but no. i started doing housework and put that on the in the background. then i started watching it. and then i had to finish it. yes, i watched the damn marathon til the end from where i caught it until the wedding… and then cried.

IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.

(i must be pms’ing or something.)

it’s 7PM on a monday and i don’t know what to do with myself… manny went home to work on a paper and i’m too lazy to bother to find someone to chill with… i finished my chelsea handler book… i washed my stank ears… now what?

i want to punch my vice city mission in the face, so i stopped playing it. i should empty the two boxes i have left that are packed and finish cleaning my book case. maybe that’s what i will do.

i gotta figure out dinner, too.

:rolls eyes:

#lazy

this is what i did

on a day where normally i’d roll up into a ball and die of pain, i’ve gotta go get my hair did by missy missy… and then go out afterwards… ugh.

i want to do both of these things, this just stinks that i have to rely on stupid tylenol to make me feel okay enough to do it… it sucks. (i’m allergic to asprin so i can’t take anything else, bah.)

i hurt! i just want to stay home and watch movies/tv all day… maybe do some sidework. but i reeeeeally need a trim/cut. i don’t even remember the last time i cut my hair. it’s in dire need for it since it’s getting really long, it’s getting really heavy and the curls need some more bounce… i’m gonna cut my bangs back in again too… above my eyebrows. i haven’t done that in almost two years i think…

tonight there’s a benefit for my tattoo artist who had a liver transplant recently. they’ve been holding fundraisers to help with his hospital bills… i haven’t seen him in ages, so it’ll be nice to.

i need to get off of my booty and get some coffee too since i have this headache.

but its so……… far.

my favorite homegirl and i met up for a wonderful day of bk escapades! …i needed to hit up the bk heights ricky’s for hair dye and i thought going from dumbo to brooklyn heights would be a nice day trip…

i work between the manhattan and brooklyn bridges, if you didn’t know… it’s gorgeous down there in the park, so i figured it’d be a good place to just chill out for a while… it was a gorgeous spring day out today, glad we got to enjoy it before we start sweating our nyc balls off…

we got some starbucks, walked around dumbo for a few, and then we went to brooklyn bridge park… chilled out for a while, were talking… TLNYC CREATIVE BRAINSTORMING… and as jes took this picture on the left (dont mind my fat arm? lol), one of my bosses walked over to say hi, lol… we got to see his son charlie and his wife, we chatted for a few and then they went to a birthday party in the park. it’s funny i bumped into him, i’m usually never in dumbo on the weekends since i frequent it so often during the week

so we sat there for a while shooting-the-shit, and then decided to hike up to the heights… here are some pics i took

(click the thumbnails, people!)

the entire first half of my day, i got sucked into lifetime movies.

yeah, one sparks some type of an interest via the one-liner in the guide and it’s all downhill from there… one turns into like five… they’re intense! and before you know it, you wasted an entire day on them.

when i was in the bathroom further away from my office than the closer one, some chick was standing there when i opened it and she scared the shit out of me. i actually yelped.

just before, i decided to go put my hair up and totally wasn’t paying attention in the hallway. i walked into the bathroom, looked to my left and thought to myself “why and when did they install urinals?”… took a second for me to realize and by the time i did, a guy walked in and i turned so red within seconds and could only muster up “shit i’m in the wrong bathroom” and bolted.

the one i went into is across from the etsy office and i heard him go in there after he was done and some chick started lol’ing. i’m assuming at my expense…

then about two minutes ago – i opened my seltzer and it exploded everywhere.
especially in my crotch region.

fuck you, thursday.

so today was the first part of our office’s move. pictured above, lol, will show our office on the left (now) and where we will be situated tomorrow (right). yeah, 5th floor. both corner offices, across from each other, lol.

(more…)

it’s 1PM on a saturday. i’m thinking there’s a heatwave outside because it’s nearly 50 degrees…
(silly, impatient new yorker, lol) …i’ve gotta take advantage of it.

things i’ve gotta battle before 5PM:

• i should start the laundry. but i’m wearing a wife beater and no bra… this has seriously postponed the laundry this morning. (in case a neighbor comes down? you can see right through this thing, lol)
• i think i’m gonna go get some iced coffee. this starbucks shit in a bottle aint cuttin’ it…
• i’m hoping my rangers pin is upstairs, i can go get it after putting on a bra and going for the coffee.
• need to sit in a hot ass bath for a while, everything hurts.
• i have to figure out how i’m doing my hair for this show… not for vanity purposes, i can’t just throw all of this up as i normally do – my shit is HUGE, it’ll be in peoples way. but it’ll be too hot to have it all down – UGH! (big sexy hair at shows = a big no no.)
• i have to do my nails
• i MUST clean my stretched ear holes – ahhhhhhhh :barf: :x
• i have to somehow manage dressing/managing myself for a punk show (bagless/minimal hair) and then i’m going to a bday party at a bar most likely being very hip-hop. hmm.

so i was in bayside all weekend… i was helping my sister paint her room, and i was going to take my mom out for valentine’s day dinner and then we had our annual physicals today… so i slept over there last night.

where did all the horrible things start?
ah yes, my old bedroom.

(more…)

i don’t know what went wrong with my stomach this morning, but some combo of something or (i’m guessing?) a bad can of tuna put me out of commission today… i got 7 hours of sleep last night but something this morning just made me feel sooooo tired and gross… i tried to go to work anyhow… starbucks was closed for whatever reason this morning? so i went to buy mangoes and one of those bottled frapp starbucks things and went up to work as usual, didn’t work out for me.

not only did i have ANOTHER tension headache (put glasses in your bag, idiot), but i threw up three times. i couldn’t even think straight. i managed to get into hardcore code mode, finished my super important things and got up on out of there… i was scared i was gonna be one of those sick train passengers everyone dreads, but i made it!

came home, threw up again and went to sleep.
no more barfies! i ate something later on in the night and kept it down okay…

missed judge judy at 4PM… caught her at 10PM.
my plans tonight were ruined, i was supposed to go to a show with charlie.

watched the rangers lose…
…didn’t watch the wedding singer as planned since the ranger game took up so much time.
boo.

so i met up with jes last night with the intentions on rolling through to my friends party at some bar in the city – we got there, it just didn’t work out for us. (at least i got to meet my little kay for a second<3) had to leave after a while, whatever… at least i got to see jes (for like, a whole hour or so) and i got to know my trains over here a little better… i’m always looking for the fastest route to the city – think i found a good one… the M train to the L train was pretty quick.

so yeah, came home… couldn’t sleep. heat dried me out, couldn’t breathe… so i called in sick today. i have to invest in some melatonin because this whole taking some nyquil to pass out sometimes, doesn’t work out in my favor. i felt like a pile of hot shit this morning, and i was pretty sick at the beginning of the week… when i’m run-down, it really hits me hard.

i watched a little trashy tv (maury/jerry) and then a movie (the wristcutters, again – although i will remind myself not to, again.) and napped. did the judge judy thang and went to little neck (yep, long island) to go to my old bosses new restaurant – erica’s working over there… i haven’t seen her in almost two weeks and i have been meaning to go over there anyways… haven’t seen my former boss in over a year…

hung out with a few former co-workers and erica’s sister for a while, then she drove me home.
it was good to see her… i get such withdrawal when i don’t.

my hair got complimented thrice today, one old lady told me it looked like a peacock and that i should keep doing it while i’m still young – told me to ride it out, lol.

…looking forward to work in the morning, going to go get a good nights sleep

either always, or sometimes some of these things happen.

a) i’m woken up by the cat scraping in his litter box
b) i wake up either 1 min, 10 mins or 45 mins before i actually have to wake up (and each of them REALLY kills me.)
c) i stretch hard enough that i get a charlie horse
d) i hear daryl palumbo singing “desperation is calling you, desperation is callingggggggggg youuuuuu…”
e) i wake up thinking: “someday i’m not going to wake up, i’ll be dead and never feel waking up again.”
(wtf? morbid much?)
f) i’m nauseous
g) the cat is laying on my neck, trying to kill me

…my ikea adventure today took place in the red hook, brooklyn store instead of my usual hicksville, long island trip… it seemed larger than the LI one… super crowded. here’s my walk-through experience.

get upstairs, looking for mattresses. walking down normal sized aisle, chick in uggs/furry vest/hair did comes walking up with hand up in the air like she’s a model… hits my shoulder/chest while i am clearly not in her way… it took a lot to not attack her physically. instead, i turn around and say “this is ikea not a fucking runway…” my sisters boyfriend laughed and then we just totally made fun of her (and her walk).

i totally behaved myself. i only got three of those little plastic box sets, tested out some mattresses and picked up the aisle/bin of the bed i went there for… totally skipped over the market place. (go jess!)

load up the furniture cart, going to pay, some lady and her cart crash into the side of one of my boxes. rips it open, but the bed was in tact. :whew: we decide on line that we want frozen yogurt and drinks… so my sister and i leave her boyfriend near the exit elevators and buy the stuff and get online to leave.

at this ikea, you have to exit back down to the parking lot in elevators, but as we were leaving, we were being stopped for our receipt (which i had just put into my bag). my hands were full, holding my soda and frozen yogurt and i realized i had to put something down to free a hand. so i was standing in front of a garbage can while this was happening, and without thinking – i toss my new frozen yogurt. only hit my tongue like four times. WORST.

my sister and her boyfriend are almost peeing in their pants because i’m an idiot, and the lady checking the receipts figures out whats going on, realizes she can relate and goes “i’m a pot head. and one time, i dropped all my weed right into the toilet! and it wasn’t in baggies either. straight up weed, broken up. mannn i was TIGHT that day.” lol.

and then we left.
and now i have a new bed at my apt waiting for me<3

i felt odd.